Since before I met Greg, I really believed that I would have a little girl for my first child. The reason for that belief came from a dream I had just a short while before meeting Greg. I had a period of time that I was feeling blue, nothing serious but I was not feeling like myself, wasn't sleeping well, feeling a little depressed, confused, lonely, etc. I wasn't happy with what I was currently doing professionally (if you want to call it professional) and I felt like nursing school would never come around the corner with the million classes needed, all the different programs, and all the different timing associated with each program. In addition to that, I had moved out of an apartment where I had close friends and family living with me and into another after the marriages of my two roommates. I didn't know any of the girls I was living with, even though they were nice. Trevor had moved back home to Colorado, and long story short, too many changes in a short time and I was blue for many reasons even beyond those mentioned.
I was having a particularly bad week when one night I had dream. All I remember of the dream was I held in my arms a beautiful little baby girl. I felt in my dream and could forever since, the happiness I could look forward to. I felt a piece of that happiness and it was unlike anything I can describe, it wiped away my blues and if they creeped up again all I had to do was think of that dream. In part, the happiness I sensed I think came from realizing that I was dwelling on what I felt was missing in my life as opposed to all the wonderful things I had to look forward to. I had a lot to look forward to! The picture of this little girl reminded me of that. Without a thought about it, in my mind, I pictured my future with this little girl in my life and thought I would welcome a girl first once I did get married.
Not a lot of time later, maybe like two months or so, I met Greg! And of course as the story goes I got lucky and he married me and one happy year later on our 1st year anniversary we celebrated finding out that we were expecting our first child. I started calling the baby a girl before I even knew we were expecting. I called her Tess too. When we found out we were expecting, I continued to call her Tess. Greg wasn't as sure as I was, but he did it too! So, long before our 20 week ultrasound I was vocal about what I thought I was having.
I definitely had times that I doubted myself! We came up with a boy name that I really liked to and we plan on using in the future. It was a little complex I had, doubting the feelings I had and thinking maybe I was a little too positive, maybe it wasn't our first child! Maybe it would just be one of our children. Even holding to my belief, I accepted the fact that it could be a boy and I would have been just as happy with a boy despite the dream I had. The accumulation of going in for our 20 week ultrasound was somewhat intimidating for me, in a way, I wanted my dream to be validated.
Arriving to the clinic!
We went in at 10:00 on a Thursday, February 28th to get our ultrasound. I was sweating! I was excited and nervous. I got all dressed up, I knew I would get to see the baby for the first time and I wanted to look good for the occasion.
Going in...We had a lady technician and she warmed up but she was all business at first. I waited for her announcement of the gender, I wasn't sure how she would do it. It seemed for a while she couldn't get the right angle and the baby wasn't letting us see what we needed. She finally said, "Looks like we've got girl parts." What?! That didn't seem like a confident call, so I said, "really, do you know for sure? How do you know!?" She seemed surprised by my response and said, "I just do this everyday!" I laughed, okay, alright, I was just making sure. You hear a lot of horror stories about mistakes or the technician not being able to see what the sex is. I teared up, I enjoyed all the little things we got to see in the ultrasound.
She moved a lot during the ultrasound, at this point I had been feeling her move for exactly two weeks. I first felt her move on Valentine's day! The technician thought that was weird. Maybe she just thought I was crazy! So funny. She told me that was unusual, I thought, are you sure? My doctor told me it was likely that I would feel her move before the next 20 week appointment. Greg had felt her move just a few days after I had felt her move. We saw her flip, lick the umbilical cord, move around, stretch, etc. It was so cute and with all the ohh...ahhs, etc. I think the technician even joined in! It was so neat to "meet" her for the first time.
This is her little butt cheeks, I feel a little bad putting this up. I am one of those individuals that freaks out when people change their baby in public. I hate that! But, it's just a cute little small butt. No boy parts there! IT'S A GIRL!
This is her chest on the left and you can see her heart with the two chambers and her ribs. On the right, you see her face. You can see where her eyes are, the nose, and her hands up by her face. Ohh...so cute.
Profile pictures!!! Those little bubbles you see right above her nose, that is the umbilical cord.
Looking right at us again.
Profile picture, she is curled up!
Little hand with all the fingers there, waving "Hi!"
Those are the pictures...I am going to try and put the videos up, those are the best!
Little miss squirmy...I am amazed at how abrupt and strong her movements can be.
Looking right at us and turning side ways again...
Sticking her little tongue out, getting a drink.
Waving her hand, points her pointer finger....#1!
MY FAVORITE!!!! She stretches out and you can see her legs, spine, hips, so sooooo CUTE!
Stats: 11 oz, 20 weeks and 1 day, 155 bpm
Afterwards, we celebrated at Wendy's! We shared a meal, frosty, and chicken nuggets.
Then we shared the good news with friends and family with this picture. This is on Greg's desk:
Trevor came up to visit a couple weeks after the 20 week ultrasound. At LCCC, where I am going to nursing school, they also have a sonography program where they provide free OB ultrasounds after 18 weeks after you have already had your ultrasound at a doctor's office. I made an appointment and invited Trevor and my parents to come along. They all came, we had a good time. At least I did, I love to see those little, blurred, unclear images of this little girl I feel move all the time. As a BIG bonus to the trip up to Cheyenne to get the ultrasound, they had a 3D machine and give you pictures. I love the pictures.
Ahhh...you can see her hand on top of her head here.
You can really see her hand here, long fingers!
Profile picture with her arm still up by her face.
This picture isn't as great.
As it points out, there comes the tongue again!
You can see all the chambers of her heart here.
You can see all the chambers of her heart here.
Last spine picture...
A couple of blood supply pictures....
Stats: 1 lb, 22 weeks exactly, and 143 bpm
We were supposed to go back today, now that I am at 27 weeks, but unfortunately along with my classes being cancelled, so are the sonography students! Boo! I'd rather skip the snow day and get to see my little one again. I am hoping they have a make up day, but if not, the next time I see her is when I am holding her!